Our marriage has suffered over the years in a way that I doubt many marriages do. Jerry, my husband, likes to understand situations, ideas, etc. so that he knows how to handle himself, for knowing what to do in these situations gives him confidence and peace. I have a problem of frustration in repeating and repeating what I think of as rather mundane situations, that are easy to understand. My fuse is short, and I get annoyed. And Jerry is left bewildered as to why I'm annoyed, and he has a right to be. Therefore, I get down on myself for being annoyed over something that has no great importance. After resorting to prayer, finally, God led me to see something my friend told me years ago. "Have patience. It just takes Jerry a little longer to understand what you get in a twinkling. But once he understands, he doesn't forget it and he knows how to use the new information." She was so right!
And so, what happened? Well, you guessed, I think. That is what I'm blogging about today.
First Thessalonians 5:15 tells us, "Be careful that when you get on each others' nerves you don't snap at each other. Look for the best in each other, and always do your best to bring it out."
My job? To bring his attribute out. Give it space to grow and shine.
Being thorough is an admirable attribute. Jerry lets no stone unturned in discovering and learning. He works hard for understanding so that he might have an intelligent answer to any given problem. I may not be looking for any answer myself, or the problem may not have anything to do with Jerry or with me, but just conversation. If either of these circumstances occur, Jerry must be informed, by me, right away. "This is not a problem for you to solve." Or, " This is only conversation. Just thought you might be interested." A clarification of need is imperative. Then, he can listen, but does not need to understand it thoroughly.
If a situation does concern us, then I must pray for patience before I ever start! And repeat the problem and its various connections to our behavior until he has a complete understanding. I also must ask if he has further knowledge on the situation and if he does, listen carefully and agree to comply.
How I wish that I had this enlightenment earlier in our marriage. And I ask forgiveness from Jerry and from the Lord for not learning this earlier. But maybe God knew we were both really tired of the situation finally, for, once again, God spoke to me through the Scripture.
Oh, Yes! God does speak to me loudly, but from the words I read, and I am so very grateful.
Forgiven and Knowing God's plan for us, I am.....JO
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